Hey Willem
Ok, this is quite difficult to explain....but I will try my best. I'm going to start from the bottom, if you are doing something or sitting correctly then your horse will respond a lot better.
First of all....
You need to have a good position.
HANDS:
Hold your hands over the pommel of your saddle (make sure your thumbs are facing up and not inside or outside, there should be a 10-15cm space between your hand and the pommel, now keeping your hands at that height put them about 10-15cm forward from the pommel.
SEAT:
Sit back on your bum, not perched forward with a hollow back. Put your shoulders back. Take a deep breath, notice how you relax and your chest goes up? Now you need to be sitting like that, with a relaxed mind and body and with your chest raised (Make sure you take deep breaths while you are riding).
LEGS:
Place your legs slightly behind the girth with your heels down. MAKE SURE YOUR TOES AREN'T TURNED OUT!!! keep your toes forward, you might find this difficult at first so just practice that a bit, don?t expect to do it right the first time, it will take a while.
NOW FOR THE RIDING:
once you have a good position (all of the above should be done relatively well, hands, legs and seat play a part so none of them are more important than the others) you need to start right from walk. In the beginning most of the work will be done by you (don?t expect your horse to catch on immediately! It takes time...), lift your outside hand by about 2cm and with your inside hand 'Sponge', I?ll try and explain this

You can do this by loosening your pinky and tightening it again, don?t do it to fast or tighten too much, by tighten I mean pinky back in its normal position... Think of this as if you were squeezing a sponge

Put your leg on to move him forward (not heels, leg, heels stay down and out of the picture, you use leg muscles so
squeeze,
not kick), at the same time you are holding him, not holding him back with short reins, it is all about contact, contact is when your reins aren't like hanging washing lines but not pulled tight either, it is when you just feel your horses mouth but you are not hanging or pulling on his mouth, it will take some time to figure this out, but you should get it. Keep on sponging when you have your contact and while you are pushing. I like to think of this as contact and not holding coz I?m not holding him back but he knows that he is not to go any faster. The squeezing of the leg makes him use his hindquarters, when he uses his hindquarters correctly without going into trot then he will starts to carry
himself (I don?t really like bits so if you are using bitless you can say 'in a frame' or 'carrying him/her self'), he needs to be moving forward in order to do this not ambling around like a plaas pony

there needs to be some 'spring' in his step, if you know what I mean? once he is doing this he is listening to you and respecting you so you give him about 1in of your rein, let him 'take' it, he will stretch his neck down but he should keep the contact as he is 'taking' the bit of extra rein and turning it into contact, slowly give him for rein, inch by inch. after a while (as in days to weeks to months, some horses pick up on things quicker than others, the only thing that will help in training him is patience

). do this every day until he gets it.
I hope this will help you, I?ll go through this again and see if i missed out anything, I?ll post again if I have missed something

...oh I?m terribly sorry for my spelling in my previous posts as i was on the phone and get the letters jumbled up

Kelly